Emojis In Technology Courtship

Trains, planes, automobiles, and an entire host of other inanimate objects, animals, and winky faces. Despite having real trouble figuring out where I might use some of the more obscure emojis, I use the living fuck out of certain select group, when speaking to a certain select audience (read this as, girls I want to bed/girls I am currently bedding /girls I want to bed again). The three below are my go-tos. Why? Because these little yellow facial expression enable and empower me to say whatever the fuck I want, no matter how suggestive, dirty, blunt, or just downright offensive it is… and to get away with it. It’s like a little yellow button that says “oh yeah, I said that… but I didn’t say that… but I really did say that messed up, dirty, filthy thing… But it’s okay because I winked.” I branch out from time to time, but with just these three favorite winky faces I can say, or not say, whatever I want… And make it acceptable.  Here is how I use them.

e405 1)       for anything said that is lightly/playfully suggestive in manner.

 

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2)       I can’t believe you/I just said that!

 

 

 

download (1)3)      yes, I said that downright filthy thing/I’m horny/that nude photo you just sexted me is amazing (they never really are amazing, it’s a bathroom mirror after all, but the key to getting more is to set a tone that encourages more… The whole, you attract more bees with honey thing)

One piece of advice. Always let the female take the lead. Do not wink until winked upon. In fact, do not wink for as long as you possibly can. Only start winking when you are completely sure an emoji is the thing necessary to push things on to the next level. Let’s be honest… You are a full grown man and you are using little yellow cartoon faced symbols to convey your words, your thoughts, your intentions. No matter what stage in your texting back and forth that you employ an emoji, it will always give off and air of juvenile/childlike demeanor. If you haven’t yet established with your female texting partner just how much of a grown man you truly are before employing an emoji, then be ready to be viewed as juvenile or childish, possibly creepy. If, on the other hand, you have achieved your man card in her eyes, the emoji instead becomes a playful gesture. Know the timing, know the difference. Don’t lead with the emoji. Play the emoji card at the right time.

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